Hành Trình Vô Ngã by
Vô Ngã Vô Ưu
Transcript of Thich Nhat Hanh English Dharma Talks
57 Beginning Anew
Dharma Talk given by Thich Nhat Hanh
on December 28, 1997 in
Plum Village, France.
Good morning, my dear
friends. Today is the 28th of December 1997 and we are in the Upper Hamlet of
Plum Village. Every morning when we wake up, we should be able to be aware that
a new day is offered to us, to live. A twenty-four brand-new hour’s day is being
offered to us, to live. It would be a pity if we were not capable of receiving
the gift of life every morning. You may like to organize so that in the
morning, at the very time you wake up, you are aware that a new day begins and
you have ways in order to prepare yourself to welcome that day. You know that
the sun is very faithful. The earth is very faithful. Every morning when we
wake up, the earth is there for us; the sun is there for us. They never miss
the appointment. They are always there for you. Look at the earth, look at the
sun, and look at the sky. Touch them deeply and touch yourself deeply, so that
you be able to learn how to behave like the earth, how to behave like the sun,
how to behave like the sky. If the earth is available to us, if the sun is
available to us, if the sky is available to us each morning, then we should
make ourselves available to them also. Use your intelligence, use your talent
of organization so that every morning when you wake up, you can be aware that a
new day, a twenty-four brand-new hours day is being offered to you and that you
are ready to welcome it and you promise to live it fully, deeply with peace,
with joy and with appreciation. In my little book "The Miracle of
Mindfulness" I suggested some ideas: You hang something on the ceiling,
like a leaf, a branch or a wood, so that when you open your eyes, you see it.
And when you see that signal you smile at it. You smile at yourself, you smile
at life and you know that a brand-new day is offered to you. And you begin to
breathe in and breathe out… and begin your day with mindfulness. How many times
have we wasted our day, have we spoiled it. And you don’t want to do it again,
to repeat the same mistake again, and to destroy our day, to destroy the new
opportunity you are given again and again. For many of us, a day that is given
to us, to live, is very precious, extremely precious. Nothing can be compared
to the day that is given to you, to live. No fame. No profit. Nothing should be
exchanged for that. Because that is the most valuable thing. And it is
available to us. In my little book "Present Moment, Wonderful Moment"
I offer a poem … to sing or to read in the very early morning when you wake up.
Waking up in the morning, I smile. I know that a twenty-four brand-new hour’s
day is offered to me. I vow to live today deeply and learn how to look at the
people living around me with the eyes of love. You may write your own poem,
four lines…and each line would go with one in-breath or out-breath. When you
read the first line, you breathe in, when you read the second line, you breathe
out. Breathing in and smiling, breathing in, breathing out. You breathe and you
smile. And you nourish that awareness. It will help you to welcome your day and
to begin your day in the best way possible. I learned this method of practice
when I was a novice monk. When I first came to the monastery as a novice, my
teacher only began to teach me how to use poems in order to practice mindful
breathing and to dwell deeply in the present moment. So this poem is something
that you can write down and you can hang it at a place where you can see it
every time you wake up. Breathing in, I know I’m awake in the early morning.
Breathing out, I know that a new day is offered to me. Breathing in, I vow to live
my new day deeply. Breathing out, I vow to learn how to look with the eyes of
compassion at everyone around me. Sometimes we feel that we are not lucky. It
seems that we have tried. But our day has not been a success. Everything seems
to go wrong and it looks like we are not in control. And we have the tendency
to say: "It’s not my day". The harder we try, the worse it becomes…
and we surrender. We don’t want to try anymore. And we let despair overwhelm
us. That is because we have not learned, we have not trained ourselves in order
to accept and to practice beginning anew. Because the practice of beginning
anew can be done at every moment of our daily life. It can be done at 10 o’clock, it can be done at noon, and it can
be done even at 11pm. One hour before the new day begins. You know that when
you go to sleep, you are about to sink into your sleep and you tell yourself:
"This has not been a good day for me." So I give up and I hope that
tomorrow will be a better day. And going to sleep in that state of mind is not
good. Even if you have only two or three minutes to end your day, you should be
able to practice beginning anew. Because these two or three minutes are very
important. They will be able to help you to start the next day in a much better
way. The same thing is true with our life span. We say that, now I’m no longer
young. There are only a few years for me to live. It’s too late to begin anew.
You are wrong. We can always begin anew. According to the deep insight of the
Buddha, things always continue. Don’t believe in the non-continuation. The time
of dying is very important. If you can practice beginning anew at the time of
dying, then you can start something very important. That is true in all schools
of Buddhism. Because the last moment of your life, if you know how to handle
it, is very important for what will happen next. Everybody knows that the
moment of dying is a very important moment. Because it can open the door for
the next life span. If during the last moments of your life your are overwhelmed
by despair, by hate, there is a chance that you will go in a direction where
there is more darkness, more anger, more despair. But if you know how to live
the last moment of your life span in joy, in hope and in compassion, that will
open the door for a much better destination. So we can begin anew, even at the
last moment of our life, not to say at the last moment of our day. The practice
of beginning anew is so crucial, so important…. So in one day, in the period of
twenty-four hours you have plenty of chances to begin anew. You can begin anew
at any time of the day… eight o’clock, ten o’clock, eleven o’clock, two
o’clock, four p.m., nine PM and so on. Always begin anew.
(bell)
The New Year is a
great opportunity to begin anew. Because many people look at the new year, the
year to come, with hope. "I will do better next year," you promise
yourself. As we still have three days before the year ends and before the New
Year begins, we may practice sitting meditation and walking meditation in order
to see how we can begin anew, how we can prepare ourselves. So that the New
Year will be a much better year than this one. Three days is a lot. Before the
New Year begins, we can already have everything renewed. Of course we have made
mistakes. Of course we have been not very skillful. Of course we have made
ourselves suffer. Of course we have made the people around us suffer. But that
does not prevent us from beginning anew and to make things much better next
year, or even the next moment. We should look at our suffering in such a way
that the suffering can become a positive thing. Of course you have made some
mistakes. You have been unskillful. All of us are the same. We always make
mistakes. We are very often unskillful. But that does not prevent us from improving,
from beginning anew, from transforming. The Buddha said that if you have not
suffered, there is no way you can learn. If the Buddha has arrived at full
enlightenment, that is just because he had suffered a lot. The suffering was
the path that helped him to arrive at full enlightenment, at full compassion,
at full understanding. If you want to go to the Buddha, you need your
suffering. Because if you do not know what is suffering, then there is no way
you can come to the Buddha. You have to come to the Buddha with all your
suffering. Suffering is the path. By true suffering you can see the path of
enlightenment, the path of compassion, the path of love. According to the
teaching of the Buddha, it is by looking deeply into the nature of your sorrow,
your pain, of your suffering, that you can discover the way out. If you have
not suffered, you can not go to the Buddha. You have no chance to touch peace,
to touch love. It is exactly because of the fact that you have suffered, that
now you have an opportunity to recognize the path leading to liberation,
leading to love, leading to understanding. Don’t be discouraged when you see
that in the past you have suffered and you have made other people suffer. If we
know how to handle the suffering, we will be able to profit from our suffering.
It is like an organic gardener. If she knows how to handle the garbage, she
will get a lot of compost for the growth of her vegetables and her flowers. It
is with the compost of the suffering that we can nourish the flower of
understanding, of peace, of love. That is why we have to learn how to manage
our suffering, how to cherish, how to preserve, how to transform our suffering.
When we practice
mindful breathing, we nourish the awareness of being there in the here and the now.
When we practice mindful walking or mindful breakfast making, we give ourselves
an opportunity to touch what is there in the present moment, to touch the
wonders of life that are available to us. The wonders of life that are
available inside of us and around us. And we are kind of providing us with a
boat that helps us not to sink into the ocean of forgetfulness, the ocean of
despair, the ocean of suffering. We feel a little bit heavy because of the
weight of the suffering in us. Left alone, we can easily sink into the river of
suffering. When you release a piece of rock into the river, it will sink. But
if you place the block of rock on a boat, you know that it will not sink. The
suffering in us is like a piece of rock. Sometimes it feels heavy and it makes
us sink into the ocean, into the river of suffering. According to the teaching
and the practice offered by the Buddha, even if you have blocks of suffering in
yourself and if you know how to provide yourself with a boat, you will not
sink. You will not sink into the river of suffering. And joy and peace and
happiness are still possible. Even if you have these blocks of suffering within
yourself. This is a wonderful thing. And you can see it by yourself, you can
test it, you can try it… if you can provide yourself with a boat, When you
practice mindful breathing, mindfulness is a kind of boat that prevents you
from sinking into the past, into the worries, into the despair. Because mindful
breathing, mindful walking help you to be in the here, in the now, where you
can touch many wonders of life. Especially when you do it in the context, in
the setting of a retreat, when you are surrounded by a good sangha, a
practicing sangha. With the practice that is given to you, with the sangha that
surrounds you, supporting you, you have that boat that will prevent you from
sinking into the river of suffering. If you have tried, you know that what the
Buddha said is true. Looking around you, you see that these brothers, these
sisters are capable of joy, are capable of stability, of peace. They can enjoy
the blue sky. They can enjoy the sunrise. They can enjoy the presence of the
people around them. They can smile. They can be happy. When you feel that the
practicing sangha is around you, supporting you, every step the other person
makes, every look the other person has, every smile the other person offers,
will have the effect of supporting you. You have confidence in the sangha. You
have confidence in the practice. With your practice and with the sangha
surrounding you and supporting you, you have the boat that prevents you from
sinking into the river of suffering. Open yourself. Open yourself to the
sangha. Open yourself to the practice and you know that the sinking will stop.
You will be floating. And even if you still have the sorrow, the pain in
yourself, it is still possible for you to smile, to be happy. Because with the
support of the sangha, with the practice, you are capable of touching the
wonders of life that are available. A new day that is offered to us is part of
that wonder of life. The Buddha, the sangha, our parents, our ancestors, our
children, their children expect us to live our day deeply and happily. Because
that is not only for us, but also for them. If I can smile, if I can enjoy the
blue sky, it’s not only for my sake. It’s also for the sake of my ancestors,
It’s for the sake of my teacher, of the Buddha, of my students, of my children,
of their children also. Because it’s very important to be peaceful. It’s very
important to be happy. And you do it not only for yourself. You do it for
everyone of us. Every time you can smile, every time you can enjoy the blue
sky, you make us have more confidence, you support us. With the sangha we can
do it. When after spending time with the sangha, we go home, we will be our own
sangha. Because we know that taking refuge in the sangha is a very deep, very
important practice. The sangha is a boat. The sangha provides a support. The
practice in the setting of a sangha will be much more effective. We will be
surprised to see that even if the blocks of pain, of despair, of suffering are
still there, it is still possible for us to enjoy the morning, to enjoy the
afternoon, to enjoy the wonders of life that are available. We have the bad
habit of allowing ourselves to suffer. But we know that suffering is not
enough. To suffer is something helpful. But to suffer is not enough. We have to
learn something else. To learn how to be joyful, how to be peaceful, how to be
loving. And our suffering can help, There are times when we are angry at
ourselves. There are times when we are overwhelmed by despair. We did not want
to say it. We did not want to do it. We knew very well that if we said it, if
we did it, we would destroy, we would cause a lot of damage. And yet we have
done it, we have said it. And we have damaged our relationship. We have made
ourselves suffer and we have made the person we love suffer. And that has been
repeated again and again. The old habit energy that we have in us, plays a very
tricky role in us. We are intelligent enough, we are lucid enough to know, that
if we did it, if we said it, we would cause a lot of damage. And yet that habit
energy always pushes us to do it, to say it. And we have done it, we have said
it. We have caused damage. We beat our chest, we pull our hair, and we get
angry at ourselves. We promise not to do it again next time. But when the next
time comes, we do it again. That is the habit energy. The old habit energy. To
practice beginning anew, we have to learn how to handle the habit energy in us.
Sometimes you say: "It is stronger than me". Yes it is strong. But
that does not mean that we can do nothing about it. The Buddhist way of dealing
with that habit energy is to recognize it as existing and that is all. You
don’t have to fight.
Several years ago
there was a young American person, who stayed in Upper Hamlet, here, for the
whole Summer Retreat. During the first three weeks he was so happy. He had
never been happy in his life, he told us. In three weeks he was so happy.
Because he got more stable, more loving, more caring. The sangha in the Upper
Hamlet that supported him in his practice… everyone was practicing joyfully…
and he profited from the energy of the sangha. Walking mindfully, sitting
mindfully, cooking mindfully, working mindfully, doing everything mindfully. So
he was quite solid and happy during the first three weeks. But one day he was
asked to go to Sainte Foy la Grande, to do some shopping. It was at a day when
in Plum Village we practice, we celebrate Thanksgiving Day à la Buddhist. Each
group of practitioners organized so that they could offer on the ancestral
altar a national dish. Because on that day, called Thanksgiving Day, we express
our gratitude to our ancestors, our blood ancestors, and our spiritual ancestors.
We want to express our gratitude to our spiritual ancestors, our teachers. We
want to express our gratitude to our friends who support us in difficult
moments of our life and we also want to express our gratitude to all living
beings that maintain us, supporting us in our daily life. So the object of
gratitude, of Thanksgiving was very concrete: ancestors, teachers, friends and
living beings. The Dutch people got together to prepare a Dutch offering. The
French people came together and prepared something very French. And of course
that young man was sent to the market, to buy some provisions in order to make
an American offering. He was in Sainte Foy la Grande, shopping alone. That’s
not very wise, to go alone. During the time of shopping, he suddenly became
aware, that he was restless. He was restless. He was trying to do things
quickly, rushing and restless. The energy of rushing, the energy of
restlessness was there in him and he was not happy. And yet during the three
weeks preceding it, he had never felt that kind of energy within him. But there
was a difference. This time, when he got restless and rushing, he knew that he
was restless, he knew that he was rushing… not peaceful. Because he had been
practicing mindfulness, to recognize what was the feeling that was there, what
was happening in the present moment. That is why he was able to recognize the
fact that he was restless, he was rushing. Suddenly he had a vision. He saw
that his mother had transmitted this energy to him. Because his mother is always
like that, always rushing, always restless. And he got it from his mother. So
he began to go back to his in-breath, he smiled and he said: "Hello
mummy". And suddenly the energy of restlessness, the energy of rushing
just disappeared. From that moment on, every step of his became mindful and he
was decided to maintain his mindful breathing. He spent another hour in Sainte
Foy la Grande with solidity. And that energy of restlessness did not come back
to him during that time. When you are surrounded by a sangha, where there is a
solid practice, that kind of negative energy may not have a chance to manifest.
But when you are alone, it may get a chance. That is why you have to profit
from the time you are with the sangha in order to go deep into the practice. So
that when you go home, you already have the habit of the practice. So that you
can handle the habit energy in you with efficacy, with effectiveness. And if
you do better, you want to do better, you have to create a group of friends
that practice regularly with each other. That is the work of sangha building.
It’s very important to set up a group of friends to practice where you live. So
that you can get the support, the encouragement, the energy for your practice.
To deal with the old habit energy, the best thing – and maybe the only thing –
is to just recognize it as it is. And every time it is recognized, it will lose
its strength. It will not overwhelm you. It will not be able to push you to do
things and to say things that you don’t want to do, you don’t want to say.
"Hello mummy," that is the practice. You recognize the source of that
energy. You recognize, you embrace it. You don’t fight it. You just embrace it,
with the energy of mindfulness. You go back to your mindful breathing, to your
mindful walking in order to generate the energy of mindfulness. And it is
exactly with that energy of mindfulness that you embrace the habit energy.
"My dear old friend, I know you. I will take care of you." That’s
what you do. Embrace it tenderly. Recognize it, smile to it and it will not be
able to push you to do things and to say things that you don’t want anymore.
And every time it is recognized, it is embraced, it will lose some of its
strength. And it goes back to the depth of your consciousness in the form of a
seed. A little bit weaker than before. Next time when it manifests itself, you
do it again: you smile to it, you recognize it. "Oh my dear old friend. I
know you. I take care of you," and you embrace it. And then some time
later on it will go down again in the form of a seed a little bit weaker than
before. If you continue to do like that the habit energy in you will be
transformed little by little until it can no longer do anything to you. You get
things under control. Even the Buddha practiced like that. You have heard of
Mara. Mara looks like, sounds like the enemy of the Buddha. But in fact, Mara
is just the negative energy that can manifest itself. In every one of us there
is the Buddha, there is also the Mara. Buddha is the positive energy and Mara
is the negative energy. Both, Buddha and Mara are of organic nature. This means
that you can use the energy of Mara in order to fabricate the energy of the
Buddha. And if you don’t know how to take care of the energy of the Buddha, it
will be transformed into the energy of Mara. Please remember the image of the
flower and the garbage. If you don’t know how to take care of the flower, the
flower will become the garbage. And if you know how to take care of the
garbage, it becomes the flower again. So flower and garbage are of organic
nature. The energies in us are the same, they are of organic nature. Your
suffering, your negative energy should well be taken care of. With that energy
you can fabricate the energy of acceptance, of understanding and of love. Suffering
is very important. One day, after having visited his family in Kapilavastu, and
helped to arrange… to solve some difficulties concerning the royal family, the
Buddha left home and went to the kingdom of Koshala. At that time, his father
was still alive. King Suddhodana was still alive. And, of course, every king
has problems. Every kingdom has problems. The king has problems with his
ministers. There is the problem of continuation, the problem of corruption, the
problem of political instability. And when the Buddha went home and visited his
family and his kingdom, he was aware of all these problems. He did his best in
order to help, to arrange things… to arrange for a continuation for his father
- Mahanamam was appointed to be the next king – and then he left. One day, when
he was sitting in a wood with a number of his monks, he saw Mara coming to him.
Mara was dressed in a very beautiful way, like a sage, and Mara said:
"Lord Buddha, you know that with the amount of intelligence and compassion
you have, you can be an excellent politician. You can help so many people. You
can make peace reign on your kingdom, the kingdoms around it. Why don’t you
consider going home and be the best politician of all times." The Buddha
looked at him deeply and he said: "Mara, I know you. My old friend, I know
you too well." And Mara just disappeared. You know, this kind of stories
is told several times in the sutras. Mara visited Buddha a lot of times. Every
time Buddha was able to recognize Mara and smile at him. And Mara was not able
to do anything to the Buddha. So who are you. You are the students of the
Buddha. You have to practice the same. You may be visited by Mara several times
a day. You are tempted by him to do things and to say things that you don’t
want to say and to do. Right? So you have to practice like the Buddha to have
mindfulness. And that mindfulness is to recognize the habit energy, to
recognize Mara as he is, as she is. Then you can stabilize yourself… in control
of yourself. In Plum Village we offer very concrete practice and not just to
talk about mindfulness and the principle of the practice. You have to train
yourself in order for you to have a permanent boat, transporting you and not to
allow to let yourself sink again and again into the river of suffering, the
river of forgetfulness. When you let forgetfulness overwhelm you, then you
sink. Forgetfulness is the opposite of mindfulness. The practice of walking
mindfully, of breathing mindfully, of sitting mindfully, of breakfast making
mindfully, is the practice of preserving the boat for yourself. In Plum Village
we have several kinds of practices that you can adopt. Like climbing the
stairs. Every day you have an opportunity to climb up the stairs several times
and to go down the stairs several times. You have to sign a treaty with the
staircase. When you climb a step, you breathe in. When you climb another step,
you breathe out. That is slow climbing. But if you want to climb a little bit
quicker, you climb two steps while you breathe in, you climb two steps while
you breathe out. Always mindful. Mindful climbing, mindful going down. And you
promise to the stairs that if half way you realize that you have not climbed
mindfully, you have to go back to the starting point again. There are only 18 steps…
or 20, or 22. That’s not a lot. In my hermitage I have stairs of 18 steps and
in the last 10 years I have never failed to climb and to go down the stairs in
mindfulness… all the time. You have to be firm with yourself, with your
practice. If you succeed with your stairs, you will succeed everywhere. When I
climbed the Khuatakuta Mountains where the Buddha lived, when I climbed the
Wutaishan in China, I always climbed with mindfulness and I enjoyed every step.
When I find myself in a marketplace, in a supermarket – I don’t go to the
market very often – but every time I find myself in the supermarket, I always
walk like that. Walk mindfully every step… at the railway station, the airport…
I always walk like that. Because I have succeeded with my staircase. Every time
I climb into an airplane, even if the ladder is very simple, aluminum, I always
climb like that. Like I climbed the Khuatakuta Mountain, the sacred mountain of
the Buddha. I enjoy every step. And if you learn how to walk mindfully, to
climb mindfully like that, you will be able to recognize every feeling, every
habit energy that is manifested in you. If you don’t have a staircase, then use
a portion of the path leading to the bus stop. Twenty meters from this corner
of the road to the bus station… something like that… and you vow to yourself
that every time you go through that portion of the path, you have to be mindful
in every step. And if halfway or third of the way you realize that you have not
made one mindful step, you go back to the beginning and you begin anew. You
have to be firm to yourself. And very soon you will find that you are capable
of being mindful. There you are in your kitchen, preparing your breakfast
mindfully, making your tea, your coffee mindfully. There you are in a supermarket,
shopping mindfully, smiling, and recognizing the habit energy every time it
manifests. Please do. Please try. We do not just talk about it. We do it. Use
your intelligence. Use your talent of organizing in order to make your practice
successful.
(bell)
There was a couple
that was about to get married in Plum Village. They wanted to see me before the
wedding ceremony and I received them in my still sitting hut. They said,
"Thay, there are only twenty-four hours left before our wedding. What do
you think that we can do to prepare for our wedding to be successful?" I
said, "Beginning anew. The most important thing for you to do, is to look
deeply into yourself, to see if there is something still as an obstacle in you.
Is there anyone you have not reconciled with at this moment? Is there anything
within you that you have not reconciled with at this moment?" Because
reconciliation is not always reconciliation with another person, but it is
reconciliation with your own self. There are many conflicting things in you and
you have to sit down and harmonize the things within yourself. You have to
practice deep walking, deep sitting in order to realize, to see very clearly
your own situation, what’s to be done. It’s like now: we are three days before
the New Year. And the time we have here is just for that practice. We do
walking meditation, we do sitting meditation, we do cooking, we do washing and
all these things are for looking deeply in order to see what’s to be done in
order to begin anew. It turned out that there were so many things for the
couple to do before the wedding and they had only twenty-four hours. Among
these things, a friend that they had to reconcile with very quickly. Otherwise
the happiness would not be perfect, or near perfect. Is it possible to
reconcile with someone who is very far away from Plum Village? You are a
student of Thay, you have faith in him, and you want to do the work of
reconciliation now, so that at the time of your wedding you can really begin
anew, a new life. But how can you send a letter to that person in twenty-four
hours? They tried to practice and they succeeded in their practice. I told them
that what is important is within your heart, within your mind. If
reconciliation is done within, that is enough. Because the outcome, the effect
of that reconciliation will be felt everywhere later on. Even if the person you
want to reconcile with is very far away, even if she does not accept to pick up
the phone, even if she refuses to open a letter sent by you, even if she is already
dead, reconciliation is still possible. That person may be your father, that
person may be your mother or your sister or your daughter or your son. That
person may still be alive, that person may already have died. Reconciliation is
still possible. Because that is to work it out within yourself so that peace
can be restored. You know that there is a possibility to begin anew, to make
everything new again. Your mother may have passed away. But if you look deeply,
she is still alive in you. You can not be without your mother. Even if you hate
her, if you are angry at her, even if you don’t want to think of her. She is
still in you. And more than that: She is you. And you are her. You are the
daughter of your mother. You are the son of your mother. You are the
continuation of your mother. You are your mother – whether you like it or nor.
Reconciliation is to be made within yourself. Reconcile with yourself.
Reconcile with your mother in yourself. It means reconcile with yourself.
Reconcile with your father. It means to reconcile with yourself. Reconcile with
your son, reconcile with your daughter is to reconcile with yourself. Reconcile
with your partner is reconcile with yourself. Please look deeply and see that.
It’s not very difficult to see. Reconcile with yourself. Yourself as your
father, yourself as your mother, yourself as your son, yourself as your
daughter, yourself as your partner. Reconcile with yourself for the sake of the
world, for my sake, for the sake of the Buddha, for the sake of all living
beings. Because your peace, your serenity are very crucial for all of us.
There was a Vietnam
War veteran who killed five Vietnamese children and who could not forgive
himself for having done so. During a battle he saw many of his friends killed.
He was so angry, he wanted to retaliate. So he set up a small ambush in the
village where his friends had been killed. His ambush was very simple. He made
sandwiches and he put explosive between the pieces of bread, with meat and
other things. And he left the sandwiches at a place near the entrance of the
village and he hid himself to observe. Five children came out of the village,
they discovered the sandwiches and they began to eat the sandwiches. A few
minutes later he saw the children begin to cry, to suffer. Their parents came
out in despair. They wanted to call an ambulance, but it was a very far away
place. It was impossible to call an ambulance. And he knew that even if there
was an ambulance, it would be to late to save the children. So he saw the children
die in the arms of their parents. Since the time when he went back to America,
he could not sleep. The image of the five dying children always remained with
him. Every time he found himself in a room alone with children, he could not
bear it, he had to run away, run out of the room as quickly as possible.
Traumatism. He could not talk about it to anyone, except his mother. His mother
said, "My dear son, that is war. That’s the kind of damage that always
happens during a war and you don’t have to suffer that much. But that did not
help him at all, he continued to suffer. He could not forgive himself for
having killed five children. Until the day when he came to a retreat that we
organized for American Vietnam War veterans. It was a very difficult retreat. Many
veterans did not accept to tell their story. Many had followed the advice of
their psychotherapist to come to the retreat. But they suspected that the
retreat might be a kind of ambush in order to kill them, especially as a
Vietnamese Buddhist monk was conducting the retreat. "He organized this
retreat in order to kill us all in revenge." One day, during a walking
meditation, I saw a war veteran walking behind, following us in a distance of
twenty meters. We did not know why he did not join the group. But after that
someone asked him and he said that he was afraid. If something happened, he
would still have time to run away, if there was an ambush. Another war veteran
did not accept to sleep in a dormitory. He put a tent in a wood and he slept
alone. He set up Booby traps around his tent in order to protect himself. In a
circle of six persons, we organized Dharma discussions. And we allowed each
veteran to have a time to tell their story, maybe for the first time. We waited
and waited, we encouraged them to talk. But there were many veterans who were
not capable to speak. On the third day, on the fourth day there were people who
got enough strength and courage to begin to tell their story. One of them told
us the story about the five children killed in the sandwich ambush. I took him
to a walking meditation and I said, "Now, my friend, you have killed five
children. All right. But do you know that there are children who are dying
today? Do you know that if you, want you can save them? There are children who
die a little bit everywhere in the world, including in the United States of
America, in your own block. If you know how, then you can save one child a day,
or even two children a day. There are children who need just one tablet of
medicine to be saved. And that child dies just because she does not have the
needed tablet of medicine. Why don’t you use your life in order to save these
children? Why don’t you begin anew? Why do you allow yourself to be caught in
that feeling of guilt, to kill yourself? The teaching of the Buddha is clear.
You can always begin anew. You have killed five children, but you have the
opportunity to save fifty children. Why don’t you do it? Why don’t you receive
the Five Mindfulness Trainings, making the vow to protect life and to save the
life of living beings? Then you go out into the world and you practice
compassion. That practice will liberate yourself. When you have the intention
to receive the Five Mindfulness Trainings, you are determined not to kill,
instead you decide to protect life, to save life and you get a lot of energy
within yourself. And with that energy you will not sink into the river of
suffering. That energy is the boat. By practicing the precepts, by making the
determination to live by the Five Mindfulness Trainings, you offer yourself a
boat. As long as you abide by the practice, as long as you stick to that boat,
you will not sink into the river of suffering." And the war veteran was
greatly inspired. He could not imagine that things could be that easy. He was transformed
very quickly, overnight, into an other person. He knew the way out, he had
confidence. He knew that he could do it. "The practice of beginning anew
is a miracle. It can change us overnight. It can open the door for a new life.
It can be done now. You don’t have to wait. Especially when you have a sangha,
you have a teacher, you have the Dharma, and you have concrete means of
practice. Beginning anew is something you can do right here and right now. You
do it not only for yourself. You do it for the five children that you have
killed. They will be able to smile. Because they have helped you in order to
help other children who are dying in the present moment. One day you will see
the five children in you will smile to you, forgive you and encourage you to go
further on your path." This veteran has come back to Plum Village several
times and he has been a part of our practicing sangha.
Do you regret not
having said the right things to him or to her before he/she died? Do you regret
that you have not been kind to him or to her during his/her lifetime. Now you
feel that it’s too late. No, you need not feel that kind of regret. Because
that person is still in you if you can begin anew. Smile at him and say the
things you should have said but that you had no chance to say to him. You say
it right now and he/she will hear it. Sometimes you don’t have to say. You just
live by the spirit you have found in the practice of beginning anew and then he
will know it, she will know it. You don’t have to say sorry to the five
children you killed. If you know how to live your life, how to save the
children of the present and the future, these five children will understand
you, will smile at you and will support you on your path of practice. There is
no reason why we have to be caught in our complex of guilt. Because everything
is possible. The past is not gone. The past is still available in the form of
the present. If we know how to touch the present deeply, we touch the past and
we can change even the past. That is the teaching of the Buddha. If you have
said something unkind to your grandma, you can begin anew. Just sit down,
practice mindful breathing, in and out, and you ask your grandma to be there,
in you. You smile at her and you say, "Grandma, I’m sorry. I will not say
something like that again." And you will see your grandma, smiling. That
practice will bring peace to you, will make you anew and will bring a lot of
joy and happiness to the people around you, as well as to the future
generations.
(bell)
During World War II
there were people who committed crimes against humanity. Several of them are
still alive. From time to time we hear about a trial. People gather to
determine whether this person has committed a crime against humanity, killing
Jews in their own area, sending Jews to reeducation camps. People spend a lot
of time to judge, to decide whether that person is to be punished or not. In
the light of this teaching, the judges, the public opinion have to be informed
that there is a much better way. Even if the person has committed crimes
against humanity, he or she still has time to begin anew. Why don’t we allow
them to make a vow, to make a determination to begin anew. If they have killed
people in the past, now do they have the time in order to save people in the
present moment. This is my proposal to governments, to the judges and to the
public opinions. Not only for those who have committed crimes against humanity,
those who have killed, those who have robbed, those hundreds of thousands who are
in prisons. Why don’t we try to bring the teaching of beginning anew to these
prisons and allow the people who have made mistakes, who have killed, who have
stolen, who have destroyed to have an opportunity to begin anew. If you are a
writer, if you are a teacher, if you are a psychotherapist, if you are a
columnist, try to make this teaching available. Many people are dying,
languishing in prisons. They have made a mistake. They have not been mindful.
Out of anger, out of ignorance, they have killed, they have destroyed. But do
they have a chance to begin anew? I think they do. We should allow all of them
to have a chance to begin anew, to start their life again. We have to advocate
with the governments, with legislators, with judges, so that these people,
young or less young, get a chance to begin anew. Let us work together. Let us
learn to look with the eyes of compassion. Let us not think that punishment is
the only way. Compassion is a much better way. Understanding is a much better
way. Beginning anew is a great practice, is a great teaching of the Buddha.
We will be
celebrating New Year in the New Hamlet and at midnight we will practice
"Touching the earth" in order to touch our ancestors. It is very
important to touch our ancestors. When we touch our ancestors, we touch
ourselves. We know that we are one. If we know that we are from the same roots,
then we know that we are one. After having bowed to our ancestors, we turn
around and bow to each other and embrace each other and forgive each other for
the unskillfulness that has been committed in the past. That is also beginning
anew. It would not mean anything if you bow to your ancestors and you don’t
forgive your brother or your sister. In the Christian Bible you find the same
teaching. Before you place an offering on the altar of God, make sure that you
have reconciled with your brother. If you have not reconciled with your
brother, placing an offering on the altar of God, does not mean anything.
Celebrating New Year, we have to celebrate in such a spirit, touching our
ancestors, blood ancestors and spiritual ancestors, we have an opportunity to
realize that we are brothers and sisters to each other.
58 Dharma Talk: Community as a Resource
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